Romantic Fortune
by HyperCaz
Summary: A “psychic Ancient” appears in Atlantis, giving out romantic fortune…Sheyla, McWeir and…Checkett! Just a bit of fun
1. John and Teyla

Romantic Fortune

Rating: PG (just to be safe)

Genre: Romance/Humour

Summary: A "psychic Ancient" appears in Atlantis, giving out romantic fortune…Sheyla, McWeir and…Checkett! (Just a bit of fun)

AN: This is not meant to be a serious and in depth fic. It's just a bit of fun!

* * *

Chapter 1

* * *

Most people do not like having to watch the Stargate during the lunch hour. It is dull and everyone else is off stuffing their faces. For once, the technician on duty had something interesting happen to him. 

The technician watched the power readings with a frown on his face. Something was not right. A mild amount of energy had been diverted from the ZPMs to a dome shaped room a few hundred metres away from the command centre. He tapped away, trying to stop the diversion.

Just as he thought he was making some headway, the system threw him out and a loud voice boomed throughout the whole city,

"Hear me all, those who are in Atlantis! I am the one who can tell you your fortunes. Come seek audience with me in the Room of Twilight."

As everyone hurried to the command centre, the technician gleefully explained what had happened. He pointed out the domed room, which was clearly the Room of Twilight.

"Huh, a fortune teller," Major Sheppard didn't sound impressed.

Dr Weir was worried, asking,

"Is it at all possible that we have Wraith or Genii in the city?"

Everyone looked around at each other uneasily. This was how John realised that the only person missing was Rodney McKay. He wouldn't put it past the scientist to pull a stunt like this. As Elizabeth ordered that no one go near the room, Sheppard knew it was an order he would disobey.

He was definitely checking it out.

"Wish me luck, Ford," John muttered aside to his lieutenant.

Aiden smirked,

"Have fun, sir."

* * *

John Sheppard approached the Room of Twilight with a mind to poke fun at whoever had set up the elaborate joke. He didn't believe it was a Wraith or Genii. Those suckers didn't know the meaning of the word 'humour'.

"Alright, grand and magnificent fortune teller!" He shouted, entering the empty domed room, "Have your fun."

"Hmmm…" Said a mystical voice from the walls.

John crossed his arms, nonplussed at not seeing the joker,

"Look, if this is some kind of joke, McKay, can you get it over with?"

"I am not this McKay of which you speak, John Sheppard," Answered the voice, sounding a little offended, "I am a psychic Ancient. What is it you wish to know? Who will win the war against the Wraith?"

"Well that's easy. See, we're going to kick ass."

"Or…will Teyla ever share your feelings?"

This got him. Sheppard stopped, the snide remark that had been poised on his lips evaporating. He tried to think of some denial, trying to hide his interest. But it seemed the "psychic" had won this round.

The voice sounded amused,

"Oh, don't worry. I'll help you out there. Tomorrow you will have an opportunity to tell her how you feel. You will be in one of the south passages."

"I don't have to believe you," John snapped.

"Well, no…but if you still think I'm McKay, annoying I may be but you actually would believe me."

"So you're someone I know, huh?"

"Um…what I really meant was…I'm going to have another customer. You won't get a better chance. You'll be all alone."

Putting on a scowl to hide his discomfit, John Sheppard left the room. He was desperately trying to plan what he would say to Teyla. And he only had one day to do it…

* * *

John made his way to the mess and sat down at a table where his lieutenant was working through his appetite.

"What did it say?" Ford wanted to know, noting the odd look on the Major's face.

Sheppard glanced up,

"What? Oh. Nothing."

At this point, Teyla joined them, carrying a tray of fruit that had been shipped from the mainland. She set it down, speaking casually,

"There is talk of an Ancient in the city."

John coughed and looked away. Aiden raised his eyebrows,

"Yeah, supposed to be telling the future. Sheppard went off to it this morning."

"And what did this Ancient say?" Teyla asked curiously.

She and Ford looked expectantly at the Major. John shifted awkwardly,

"We don't even know if it is an Ancient yet. For all we know, it could be McKay being an ass."

It was just typical that Rodney should come over as John was saying this. Sensing an approaching conflict, Teyla said quickly,

"I am sure that if Rodney was the Ancient, he could not keep the joke for long."

"If I was that psychic, I wouldn't tell anyone about their future," Rodney said firmly, shaking off his offence.

John smirked,

"'Cause no one should know too much about their future, right, Doc?"

The physicist cringed but did not challenge him with an argument about _Back to the Future_. Ford mused,

"I wonder who it is. What did they tell ya Major?"

"Erm…"

"It appears that Major Sheppard does not wish to share his experience," Teyla commented, "I will go myself to this Ancient and report back on what is said."

Rodney rolled his eyes,

"Sure, what a valuable use of your time."

* * *

Teyla entered the room and studied its dome ceiling intently, looking for some sort of space where the mystery "Ancient" could hide. She spoke clearly,

"I seek to hear my fortune."

"Welcome Teyla Emmagan," The voice greeted, "What is it you want to know?"

"What fortune can you give?"

"You are smarter than the last one who was here…the fortune I can give relates to romantic involvement."

Teyla shook her head, smiling. Rodney was right – it was a waste of time. She had often approached those who claimed to have foresight and their incompetence at predicting her partners was laughable.

"Don't be so hasty," The voice cautioned, "I know all."

Teyla turned to go, but the door shut of its own accord. She raised her eyebrows. Perhaps an Ancient really was around somewhere. She asked,

"Well, then, will you try to tell my romantic fortune?"

"A..Ah, very well, Teyla Emmagan. Soon the one you like will admit his feelings for you."

Teyla frowned for a moment. She didn't think she liked anyone…did she? An image of John Sheppard sprang to her mind. She chuckled,

"There is no chance of that. His affections are reserved for Dr Weir."

"Are you blind? He likes you. Alright…tomorrow when you two are alone in a south corridor of the city, he will tell you about his feelings."

"If this is true," Teyla looked thoughtful, "Then you truly are an Ancient."

"I look forward to seeing you again, Teyla Emmagan."

The door zipped open and the Athosian leader left, not daring to hope that the voice's words were true.

* * *

The sky was darkening when Teyla returned to the mess hall. Word of her visit had spread and soon everyone clustered around her table. John Sheppard made sure he could hear what she said while keeping a reasonable distance away if her words got dangerous.

"Did they tell you when we're going to get more ice cream?" Rodney asked sarcastically.

Everyone shushed him, expectantly waiting. Teyla immediately sympathised with John. She really didn't want to embarrass the Major, who she could see trying to look like he wasn't listening. She spoke quietly, noting with amusement how everyone leaned in closer to listen.

"I believe that it is an Ancient," She told them, "It says that it specialises in romantic fortune."

Sheppard choked on his food and quickly left the table. No one noticed his odd action, clearly intent on Teyla's report. Ford asked eagerly,

"So what did it tell you?"

"Oh, please," Rodney said mordantly, getting up and leaving himself, "I'm the only one around here who can identity an Ancient."

Teyla kept the blush from her face, merely saying,

"It was for my ears only. Anyone who wishes to seek their own fortune may go there themselves."

Clearly, no one was brave enough to attempt it. Who wants to be plucked for information on their love life anyway?

* * *

The next day arrived in a brilliant blaze of sun. John Sheppard woke with it, humming with nerves. He pulled on his favourite black jumper and walked haltingly to the command centre. On the way, he met Dr Beckett, who was smiling at some personal joke.

"Good morning, John," He greeted, "Heard about ye going to the 'Ancient' yesterday."

Sheppard scowled,

"Didn't everyone?"

He was saved any further prying when they reached the command centre. Teyla was already there, conferring with Elizabeth in a low voice. Upon their arrival, Dr Weir opened her stance and said,

"What appears to be an Ancient infirmary has been discovered on the south side of the city. You might want to take a look at it, Carson."

"Aye, I will," The doctor nodded, "In a few minutes."

John cleared his throat,

"Er…Dr Weir…Teyla and I can go on ahead. We won't touch anything."

Elizabeth gave them the go and soon it was just John and Teyla trekking off to a south corridor. As they walked, Sheppard become more and more nervous and the Athosian leader kept glancing at him expectantly.

"We're almost there," John said tersely.

He cut his brisk pace, slowing to an uncertain dawdle. Teyla too slowed, trying not to look apprehensive. She asked carefully,

"What is it, Major?"

"Erm…"

_Real intelligent, Sheppard! _John thought angrily.

"Well…Teyla…maybe you should call me John," He winced at his failure to come straight out with it.

He couldn't let this opportunity slide. Who knew when he'd next get it? The psychic seemed to hint at this being a one shot. Teyla lifted her eyebrows,

"Alright…John. Is there anything else?"

It was almost like she knew. John shifted his feet awkwardly. He tried again, voice almost cracking,

"Well…uh…I really admire you…not just as a member of my team but…oh screw this. Teyla, do you want to have dinner with me some time?"

"I'd love to," Teyla answered, smiling, "For the record, M…John, I also 'really admire you'."

John Sheppard grinned back.

"Cool," He said.

He was relieved that he'd taken the chance. Teyla was pleased and also awed of the Ancient psychic. Its words had been true.

At that moment, Carson Beckett appeared at the end of the corridor, telling them to get a move on. When he'd swept past them, John lightly kissed Teyla on the cheek then followed.

* * *

"Check it out," Ford nudged Rodney, "Teyla and Sheppard are sitting by the window."

McKay sighed and looked. His eyes bugged out of his head. John and Teyla were sitting by themselves and had silly smiles on their faces. Rodney groaned,

"Oh no…"

But he was getting curious. The supposed Ancient had somehow managed to convince them to get together. There was a chance…

* * *

Next chappie…some McWeir goodness.


	2. Rodney and Elizabeth

Disclaimer: I own nothing and, of course, Checkett belongs to the brilliant seanait.

Sheaori: You have not heard of Checkett! GASP! It is the revolutionary pairing of Beckett/chair!

Emma: Oh, nuts, am I really that obvious?

* * *

Chapter 2

* * *

Major Sheppard approached Elizabeth's office with some trepidation. There was a good deal of dirt the Atlantis leader had up her sleeve. It may have been one of many reports that he'd typed up late into the night. It could even be that he'd missed a briefing in favour of a breakfast date with Teyla. 

"Come in, Major," Dr Weir said, seeing him hovering at the door.

John sat down uneasily, trying hard to keep a relaxed grin on his face. He tapped his foot restlessly. Elizabeth raised her eyebrows,

"Usually you burst in here unannounced. Is there something wrong?"

"Nah, why would there be?" Sheppard replied, attempting to keep up his nonchalant façade, "I'm sorry I missed the briefing, but hearing Rodney that early in the morning would have melted my brain or something."

Dr Weir crossed her arms,

"Alright, Major. Why do you think you're here?"

John was chagrined – he felt like a naughty child who's done so many bad things that he can't remember which one he was caught for.

"Erm…I missed the briefing and you want to tell me off?"

"That could be it," Elizabeth tapped her lips mock thoughtfully, "Or I could be wondering why you disobeyed my orders and went to that…Room of Twilight."

Sheppard relaxed. This he could deal with. He said casually,

"Oh, well, I had to make sure it wasn't a threat."

The leader of Atlantis wasn't fooled, but she let it slide. She leaned forward, asking,

"And what did this fortune teller tell you?"

"Nothing about the Wraith, sorry," John shrugged, clearly not sorry, "But I scored a date with Teyla out of it."

"Hold on. Since when were you and Teyla…?"

Sheppard snickered,

"Don't act so surprised. The Ancient or whatever told me when and where I should act on my feelings. It worked."

"I just didn't think either of you would have the courage," Remarked Elizabeth, "So that's why you and Teyla didn't turn up this morning."

It had been obvious to all but the pair for the past few weeks. A blind man could have seen the attraction between the Athosian leader and John. Dr Weir rubbed her forehead. Usually she would have been alerted by the overexcited rumour mill about this turn of events.

John stood up, presuming correctly that the absence from the briefing hadn't been that much of a big deal. He suggested,

"Why don't you try it? Just to see. I bet there's someone you like."

Elizabeth immediately thought of Simon. She shook her head,

"I don't need a prankster telling me what I already know. I expect your team ready to go by the end of lunchtime."

* * *

Anyone in the gate room at the end of the lunch hour would have thought the universe had gone cosmically out of balance. The first to arrive were Teyla and Major Sheppard, both grinning secretively and speaking quietly with each other. Then came Ford, unable to hide the glee he felt about placing several large bets on the next couple the Room of Twilight would reveal.

The last to arrive was Dr McKay. It was so unusual for him to arrive last that nearly everyone checked their watches. The physicist was hurriedly secreting away power bars into the many pockets of his uniform. Another unusual occurrence. Rodney was known for being fully prepared before arriving.

"I do believe you're late, Rodney!" John said in genuine surprise.

McKay shot him a glare,

"If you must know…"

"Not really."

"…I was talking with Carson."

"What about?" Asked Ford suddenly.

"If you must know…"

"Rodney, be quiet," Sheppard ordered, "And step through the gate like a good boy."

Miffed, the scientist strode on ahead. John blinked,

"Did he just…strut?"

"Let's go, sir," Aiden said, giving him a small push.

* * *

With SA1 out on a mission, things seemed to become eerily silent. Elizabeth Weir tried to tell herself that everyone was having some sort of siesta following lunch, but she had to concede that the team was a particularly amusing part of the expedition. She continued to plod on with her work.

Some time later, stifled by the silence, she poked her head out the door,

"It's too quiet. Why hasn't something gone wrong?"

The technician fixed her with a stare of disbelief. The command centre was empty except for him, a couple of chattering scientists and Carson Beckett, who was nursing a cup of coffee.

"I was just thinking that myself," Beckett said, "Why don't ye take a break, love?"

On any other day, Dr Weir would have disagreed and returned to work. But this day it was so quiet that it was driving her mad. She sighed,

"I guess a short walk couldn't do me any harm. Make sure you call me if something does go wrong."

As she walked, she wondered what she was supposed to do with her break. She didn't feel like being swamped by an ardent Zelenka on a sweep past the labs. Knowing Carson wouldn't let her back into her office after such a short time, Elizabeth decided to heck with it and went to the Room of Twilight.

The door was open when she arrived. Hoping she would at least get a good laugh, she stepped inside and waited. She was about to announce herself when a voice oozed from the perimeter of the domed room,

"Welcome, Elizabeth Weir. I see you couldn't keep yourself away."

"For lack of something better to do," She said indifferently, "So what are you going to tell me today?"

"I give romantic fortune."

"So I heard."

"We're a long way from Earth, Elizabeth Weir."

The leader of Atlantis sighed exasperatedly,

"What wonderful foresight you have. We are a very long way from Earth, as a matter of fact."

"That's not what I meant," The voice sounded indignant, "It is time to let go. By leading this expedition, you were trying to let go. Why don't you follow through?"

Elizabeth's lips pressed into a thin line. She hadn't told anyone about Simon and the only way anyone could know was by hacking into her laptop. It wouldn't be that hard, she reflected. She squared her shoulders,

"It's not that easy. There's nothing to follow through with."

"What about the one you like here?"

"Don't be absurd," Snorted Weir, "Even if I did feel something for someone, I couldn't pretend I wasn't in charge."

"Oh, all those secret glances at him. Nothing there at all," The voice added sarcastically, "Don't seriously tell me you weren't thrilled when Rodney stepped in front of the gun for you?"

"Rodney! What makes you think I have something for Rodney?"

Elizabeth crossed her arms, lifting her chin. The voice was not put out, however, saying,

"You're just afraid because you're the superior here. Tomorrow when he walks into your office without any of his gadgets, give him a chance. And you know how nervous he is…I'd give him a nudge if I were you."

"So tomorrow Rodney is inexplicably not going to bring any gadgets with him to my office?" Dr Weir wanted to know, thoroughly amused, "That's extremely unlikely."

"Is it? Well, our little chat is over. You know all you need to know."

Elizabeth Weir just stood there for a few moments. She reached for her radio and found that it was off. Annoyed at herself, she switched it on, saying,

"Weir to gate room. What have I missed?"

"SA1 came back just after you left," The technician reported, "I tried to call you, but your radio was off. It wasn't that important to put on the city's PA system."

Elizabeth sighed in frustration.

* * *

Rodney was not, to put it frankly, a happy camper. He had been hoping to put an end to his record number of visits to the infirmary in a row, but an overload in the device he'd been examining had zapped a nasty burn on his right hand.

"Some bandages and I'll be fine," McKay insisted.

John, who'd accompanied him down, glanced at the burn and winced,

"I don't see how you're going to hold anything in that hand."

The burn stretched onto the palm of Rodney's hand, making it impossible to open or close a fist without grimacing in pain. Dr Beckett came over with some antiseptic cream, shaking his head,

"Major Sheppard's right, Rodney. Ye should take it easy on how much ye carry for the meantime."

McKay grudgingly promised he wouldn't do anything of the sort. He got to his feet and experimentally flexed his fingers. Trying to hide his wince, he stalked off. John rolled his eyes,

"I'd better make sure he holds to that promise."

He followed Rodney quickly.

"I'm going to be a good little boy, don't worry," The scientist said sarcastically when he caught up.

Sheppard hid his smirk by pretending to cough,

"Hey, I know that. But you've just got to nod at whatever Carson says to you. Gets you out quicker."

Rodney stopped short, saying in disbelief,

"I didn't think of that."

"Oh, but you know everything," John deadpanned.

"As a matter of fact, I do."

"Prove it."

McKay shot him the look he reserved for fools – everyone, in fact,

"Haven't I proved it enough?"

"Why don't you let the Room of Twilight settle this?" John suggested, a manic gleam in his eyes.

* * *

Rodney entered the domed room. He said loudly,

"Major Sheppard tricked me into coming here, so let's keep it short, shall we? You'll say something vague, I'll tell you that this is a waste of time and then I'll leave."

"Alright then," The voice didn't sound at all fazed, "I'll make this is as succinct as possible. You really like Elizabeth but you're too scared to tell her."

The physicist, a snide remark poised and ready to go, forgot entirely what he was meant to say. He struggled to think of something, finally saying lamely,

"I'm not afraid of asking someone out!"

"Practising on your cat doesn't count."

"Wait – how do you know about that?"

"Lucky guess," The voice said dryly, "Tomorrow you're going to be alone with her. And if you ask her out, she won't refuse you. Oh, I'm afraid our time is up."

Rodney wanted to protest, but he got the distinct feeling the voice's owner was gone. Grumbling under his breath, he marched outside to a waiting John Sheppard. The Major grinned,

"So, what was your reading?"

"I don't have to answer that," Rodney said haughtily, "I'm starving. And if you're not wooing Teyla, you can sit with me."

"I'm honoured," John chuckled, wondering just what romantic fortune that his friend got.

* * *

Ignoring the pain in his right hand, Rodney was carrying his laptop through the corridors, busily sorting through some problem that Zelenka hadn't managed to solve. McKay hoped that with his laptop as a shield, he could speak to Elizabeth without making a complete and utter fool of himself.

"Good morning," He muttered as he passed them.

John Sheppard stopped in shock. He spun, but Rodney was already far down the corridor. He demanded of Teyla,

"Did you just hear that? He said good morning!"

"We'll make a person of him yet," Teyla smiled.

* * *

Rodney was drawing closer to the command centre, deeply involved with his laptop when he was caught out. He grasped at it was it was torn from him by a very stern Dr Beckett who said,

"Now what did I tell ye, Rodney?"

"I'm very busy at the moment," McKay snapped, "And I need that!"

Carson tucked the prized object under his arm,

"I'm sure ye can remember whatever was on here. If I catch ye carrying something else…"

He let the threat hang. Feeling vulnerable, Rodney tried to protest but it was futile. But he did have what was important memorised. And it sure wasn't the problem that Zelenka had struggled with.

"I'm coming back for that!" Rodney shouted as he marched towards the command centre.

When he reached it, however, his pace became slow and uncertain. Without his technological shield, he had zero confidence. Not that he had much with the laptop anyway…

"I wouldn't go in there, McKay," The technician on duty suggested as he walked past, "Dr Weir's been sending people away all morning."

Rodney's heart sank. He sighed in defeat. Maybe this wasn't the moment they were alone. The office did offer very open views through the glass panels. He hovered in the command centre for a few minutes.

After some deliberation and dirty looks for fiddling, he decided that he would try anyway. The sooner he asked and the sooner he got rejected, the sooner he could steal his laptop back off Beckett. Rodney shuffled up to the door and hesitantly entered her office, nerves humming.

"Hello Rodney," Dr Weir looked up from her paperwork, smiling.

He gulped and stammered,

"H-Hi Lizbeth."

Her eyes went to his hands. Seeing her gaze, Rodney also looked up at his bandaged right hand,

"Uh, I'm still on active duty. I'm fine. Oh you didn't ask yet. Well I'm fine anyway and I'm here for a reason."

"And what reason would that be?" Elizabeth asked gently.

He completely lost his nerve. He hunched his shoulders and suddenly found his shoes very interesting. Rodney said down to the floor,

"I was just, you know, on my way to the mess so I don't pass out or anything. I did miss breakfast."

"Oh, I see," Dr Weir sounded disappointed.

She looked down at the reports, barely reading them. After a few moments, she still felt his presence in the room. She glanced up again and had to smile at his nervousness as he scuffed the floor. Rodney noticed her looking and immediately stopped. He straightened up.

"That's not actually the reason," He admitted, "What I really meant was…I was just coming by…no, it's stupid. I'm just going now."

Elizabeth stood up, opening her expression,

"Wait, Rodney. I'll hear you out, no matter how long it takes to get it out of you."

McKay again paused, some part of him wondering why it was so hard to think up a solution to this one. He finally burst out,

"Doyouwanttohavedinnersometime?"

"You're in luck," She laughed, "I can understand Rodney-speak. I'd love to."

She walked around her desk and kissed him.

* * *

"_In case you've been living under a rock for the past hour, the latest pash was in Dr Weir's office between her and Dr McKay. Whoever bet that has won a large stash of stuff."_

"_Aiden, what are you doing on the PA system?"_

"_Er, sorry, Dr Weir. I just thought everyone should know."_

"_Who won, out of interest?"_

"_Would ya look at the time?"_

"_Lieutenant Ford!"_

Silence.

* * *

Next chappie the one we've all been waiting for…

CHECKETT!


	3. Carson and Chair

Disclaimer: Would you look at the time?

AN: Wow…I wasn't expecting so many reviews…not that I don't get reviews…(lol)

AN2: Had to raise the rating…teehee…I know in my first chappie I said PG but it was rated K…that worked…but now it must truly be K+.

AN3: (last one I promise!) And this is a looooong chappie. Compared to the others.

* * *

Chapter 3

* * *

When you've travelled across the universe to get to another galaxy, fought blue life sucking creatures and had to endure the ramblings of a certain arrogant scientist, you don't get so surprised if couples sit together for dinner or a midnight snack. 

Before the arrival of a fortune teller in the city, everyone was inclined to sit in their little cliques. The success of two pairings had inspired people to come out with their feelings without going to the resident "Ancient". All in all, the experience had lifted the morale of everyone on the base.

Juggling food and reports, Carson Beckett threaded his way through the mess to a table which had escaped some of the rowdiness that came with meal times. He dropped the stack of files on the table and sat down with a sigh.

When he glanced at those sharing the table, he almost groaned. On one side of him, Teyla and John were sitting across from each other, talking quietly and holding hands. On the other side it was Rodney and Elizabeth, whose conversation about the lack of coffee was audible.

His arrival did not go unnoticed. Major Sheppard looked over and grinned,

"I see you haven't been caught up in the atmosphere."

"No, the wee love bug has not bitten me," Carson told him without pausing from both strenuous tasks – eating and reading.

"Do I detect a hint of jealousy?" Rodney asked keenly.

Beckett shot both men an exasperated look. He said adamantly,

"And what makes ye think I don't already have someone?"

"Then why are you not sitting with her?" Teyla wanted to know, smiling slightly, "Is it not a custom to sit with your…someone?"

Elizabeth chimed in,

"And your someone would take priority over work."

"Not ye too!" Carson moaned and dropped his head in his hands.

It seemed everyone had been bitten by the love bug and had gone crazy. Even Dr Weir, who used to be something of a workaholic. If only there was a cure for this sort of thing! The doctor stood up abruptly, holding his files tightly. He grumbled under his breath,

"This is what I get after all I've done…"

As he exited the mess, John declared certainly,

"He's still going to get bitten."

* * *

The so-called "psychic Ancient" of Atlantis was a mere human. He certainly felt like it these days, what with Rodney stealing all the coffee. Well, there would be one less thing to worry about. He was through with the fortune telling business – if one could call it that. It was all about circumstance and controlling certain parts of the city.

He strode right up to the door of the Room of the Twilight and stuck a piece of paper to it with the last of his blue tack. He stepped back to admire his handy work. After a moment, he triumphantly turned and walked away.

Memory struck him and he paused in his step and groaned loudly.

What a stupid bargain he'd made. And he would have to live with it for as long as the city survived...

* * *

The paper read:

_I regret to inform my customers that I have moved on from this part of the universe._

* * *

Elizabeth Weir walked briskly out of her office, demanding of the people in the command centre,

"Does anyone know where Dr Beckett is?"

"Haven't seen him since dinner," Answered John, looking up, "Why?"

Dr Weir frowned thoughtfully, tapping her radio against her palm. She answered, troubled,

"He hasn't been seen in the infirmary and Rodney says he didn't come by like he usually does."

Sheppard order the technician,

"Do a sweep of the city."

All the dots were where they usually were. Except one.

"Someone page McKay," John ordered in a funny voice, "Ask him if anyone's meant to be in the chair room this late."

* * *

After being radioed with the situation, Teyla met up with Sheppard and Elizabeth as they moved quickly to the chair room. They swung by the labs to add Rodney to the entourage.

"It doesn't make any sense," The scientist shook his head, "Carson needs to be manhandled to get anywhere near the room."

"It is not at all like Dr Beckett," Teyla clarified.

The reached the door of the room. John glanced over his shoulder,

"Ready?"

He opened the door.

Carson Beckett had his back to the door, but by the way he jumped, he had definitely heard their entrance. He turned around, looking like a guilty man caught in the act. He cleared his throat nervously,

"Oh, what are all ye doing here?"

Elizabeth raised her eyebrows,

"We could ask you the same question."

Beckett shifted uncomfortably. He ran a hand though his hair and sighed,

"Well this concerns all four of ye anyway. Ye probably getting suspicious, but the Room of Twilight was my doing."

"You!" Dr Weir exclaimed, "How did you…know those things?"

"He's an Ancient," McKay decided immediately.

Teyla nodded in agreement. Sheppard crossed his arms, staring steadily at the doctor and waiting for an explanation. Carson quailed,

"Look, ye got it wrong. I'm no Ancient. I just wanted ye to realise yer true feelings."

"Then we owe you our thanks," Teyla realised.

John pointed out frankly,

"That doesn't solve how he did it."

He moved protectively closer to Teyla. Rodney nodded vigorously and crossed his arms in an attempt to mimic Sheppard. He desisted at a look from Weir. Beckett hung his head and muttered,

"I just wanted ye to be happy, all of ye. The chair gave me the chance to help ye."

"So you pulled up a sound system for that particular room," Rodney guessed, "And told us different sides of the same story. Big deal. Nothing extraordinary there."

Elizabeth smiled,

"Well you can't fault it, Rodney, it worked."

The scientist grinned goofily back. Carson was too miserable to roll his eyes at this. He shook his head,

"I guess ye can say it worked. But the chair wanted something in return."

"The chair doesn't _want_, Carson," Rodney reminded him, "It just _does_."

Dr Weir slid an arm around his waist to quieten him. She asked carefully,

"Would it be impossible for the chair to have desires?"

"Desires indeed," Muttered Beckett, reddening.

Sheppard asked curiously,

"So what did it want?"

Beckett looked away and said quietly,

"Me."

Three of those present just blinked. Teyla smiled, understanding,

"And you made the bargain. For us."

"Bloody good it did me," The doctor grumbled.

"Is there an explanation floating around here somewhere?" Elizabeth wanted to know.

"Aye. It all began a month ago…"

* * *

One month ago…

* * *

"Carson, just get in the chair. There are no drones, no helicopters. Just the chair. In the unlikely event of anything going wrong, you can easily fix it." 

Looking disbelieving at Rodney was Beckett. He sighed. He had paperwork he could be doing. He protested,

"I don't think this is necessary. Major Sheppard could probably handle it better in an emergency than me."

"Not if he's flying a 'Jumper," McKay said firmly, not about to budge.

"Then wouldn't I be flying as well?"

"Well maybe not! Just get into the chair and you can go back to your tea."

"It's not bloody tea! I like coffee better," Carson retorted, but he sighed and sat down.

Nothing happened. Fixing an "I-told-you-so" expression on his face, he went to sit up, but it activated with a hum. Beckett leaned back dejectedly. He was about to let off a string of complaints when Rodney's radio crackled to life.

"Rodney, how's it coming?"

The scientist flushed a little. It was Dr Weir. He turned away a bit, trying to sound professional,

"Yes, Lizbeth. I mean, Carson's just sat down."

Beckett smiled to himself. Rodney's infatuation was clear to see. The soft looks from Dr Weir – she was one of the only ones who would put him in his place. It was almost as obvious as Sheppard and Teyla. It would be easier on everyone – and the betting pools – if they just admitted their feelings.

_Then why don't they?_

Carson jumped, eyes wide as saucers. He stammered,

"R-Rodney?"

The physicist shushed him, intent on talking with Weir. No one could interrupt McKay when he was talking to his "Lizbeth". Then where did that voice come from?

_It was me._

He gave a strangled yell. McKay glared at him, explaining into his radio in annoyance,

"Just Carson. Hang on, I'll move to another room."

Beckett tried to get up, but a force was keeping him back. He struggled, scared out of his wits. He shouted in panic,

"RODNEY! The chair is talking to me!"

"Be quiet," Came the snapped reply from outside.

_I did not mean to startle you. Please don't be afraid._

Carson felt a mild electric shock run through him. He froze and shut up immediately.

"Much better!" McKay said in relief.

_Don't be afraid,_ the chair repeated,_ I was just wanting to know why they did not reveal their feelings._

Beckett blinked. It was a little hard to take in. A chair – of all things – wanted to know why his friends didn't hook up. He said in some trepidation,

"Well, they're scared. I just want to them get together. Are ye…are ye…"

_I am what you call a chair, yes. I am curious as to why you are so anxious._

"The last time I was in an Ancient chair, I nearly blew a General out of the sky."

_That was probably because it was senile_, sniffed the chair.

Carson almost laughed. The whole situation was ridiculous. Now here was a chair calling another of its kind senile. He commented,

"So it's not me, then?"

_Well…you do not have the control that some others have._

At this point, Rodney entered the room, holding the radio close to him with a wistful expression on his face. He remembered himself and tucked the device away. He walked over, smug grin back in place,

"Trying hard not to think are we? Let's start with a basic exercise. Pull up the schematics of the city."

"I don't think that's such a good idea," Beckett told him, panic returning.

The words had barely left his lips when the schematics shot up above his head. McKay was just as startled as he was. Carson defended weakly,

"Well ye never know."

Rodney examined the read outs busily, muttering under his breath. Beckett couldn't help but notice some of the food stains on the scientist's jacket.

_Well there's his problem_, The chair said matter-of-factly.

Not wanting to receive a telling off from Rodney, Carson thought back at the chair instead of talking out loud,

_Dr Weir doesn't care, as far as I know. _

_There's a very simple solution,_ the chair told him smugly, then explained the solution as simply as possible.

Beckett snorted out loud. He was careful not to make eye contact with Rodney who'd given him a glare. Carson said,

_Will it work?_

_It worked on some Ancients._

_Then I'll do it_, the doctor decided.

The chair tutted,

_Not so fast. I want something in return._

_Yer a chair. Rodney says – _

_That I don't have wants_, Finished the chair moodily, _But I want you._

Carson frowned. The logical part of his brain – which had the voice of Rodney McKay – was telling him the whole experience was clearly unreal. Beckett swallowed nervously,

"Can I get up now, Rodney?"

"I'm not done yet!" McKay said, annoyed.

"Jus' a quick question – do chairs have genders?" Beckett asked, thoroughly worried.

"Don't be ridiculous."

_We do_, the chair answered instead, sounding amused.

"Rodney, I really need to get up!"

_Don't you worry. I am female. Do you want to help your friends or not?_

"Not like this!"

"Excuse me?" Rodney frowned.

"Och…hurry up and let me go…"

Carson tried to get up, but he was held back by an invisible force. He slumped in defeat and snapped,

_Are ye going to let me go if I say no?_

_Hmm…no. I think I'll keep you_, The chair teased.

He sighed. It just didn't seem worth it. But he remembered the betting pools and how hopeless it was that neither potential couple was brave enough to make a move. Finally, Beckett agreed.

_Aye, I'll do it._

As he stood up, he thought miserably 'I just sold my soul to the devil'.

* * *

Present

* * *

"That never happened to anyone else," Rodney commented, "Why did the chair choose you?" 

At this, John Sheppard coughed awkwardly. Everyone looked at him expectantly. He stuck his hands in his pockets,

"Well…when Rodney first made me sit in the chair, something a bit weird happened. I thought I heard…"

"Yes?" Dr Weir prompted.

"…a voice saying something."

"What did this voice say?" Teyla asked, hands on her hips.

"It said…'that medical doctor with the funny accent is sexy'."

This was too much for Carson who blushed furiously. He asked in a strained voice,

"When was this?"

"Musta been a few days after we arrived at Atlantis," John recalled.

Beckett's eyes widened,

"Ye mean the bloody chair had the hots for me since then?"

"And just think," Rodney grinned wickedly, "This city has numerous security systems, even in the bathrooms. The chair can access all of these."

Carson paled. He stared with horror at the chair. Teyla smiled,

"Perhaps you can avoid holding up to your promise by no longer sitting in the chair."

"Oh, I hadn't thought of that," Beckett said sarcastically, "But every time one of ye was in the room, I had to sit in it. I tried to stay away. But the chair has its ways."

Dr Weir suggested diplomatically,

"Why don't you sort this out with…her? You could give her more of chance to explain."

Beckett looked at her like she'd gone mad. He tried to find anyone on his side, but everyone was assenting. Rodney nodded, more thoughtful than amused now,

"It would be easier for us if the chair was on our side."

"You can listen to them," John said seriously, "And be all peaceful. Or you could shoot it."

Teyla gave him a severe look which he responded to by grinning sheepishly and trying to sweeten her up by dropping a kiss on her cheek. Carson managed a small smile,

"Well, ye can't say it didn't work. Alright, all of ye wait outside."

* * *

Twenty minutes passed. Teyla frowned towards the closed door,

"Should Dr Beckett not be finished by now?"

"Give him some more time," John advised, then added with a smirk, "Poor Carson."

There was a short silence in which everyone's attention was on the door. It was broken when Weir asked,

"Whose watch is that? It's very loud."

"Mine," Rodney owned up.

"Okay then."

John crossed his arms,

"If it'd been _my_ watch, I would have had to throw it into the ocean by now. That's bias."

Any argument that had been forthcoming was forestalled when the door slid open. Sheppard began sniggering,

"I take it went well."

"It must have gone very well," Teyla commented.

Beckett flushed and hurriedly tried to tuck his shirt in. He said without looking anyone in the eye,

"I've agreed to court her."

"I think everyone would agree with me if I said that was way beyond a first date," McKay said, then turned to his girlfriend, "Do you feel like a coffee, Lizbeth?"

"I'd love one," She answered and looped her arm through his.

As they walked off, Teyla asked John,

"Is the weather pleasant at the moment?"

"I believe so," Sheppard grinned, "Late night picnic?"

No sooner had they left than Aiden Ford came along, puffing. He demanded,

"Do you always have to be so hard to find?"

Carson shook his head,

"No, ye just don't look hard enough."

"Anyway, you won a heap of chocolate and stuff in the betting pools," The lieutenant told him, "There are quite a few people looking to win that back. Do you want to place another bet?"

Beckett just couldn't help himself.

"Aye, I've got a strong feeling about…"

* * *

There you have it. Hope you enjoyed it.


End file.
